Disney to Acquire Marvel Entertainment for $4 million

[Editorial Note: This is really nerdy.]

WHAT?! Doctor Strange vs Jafar? Iron Man vs Gizmoduck? THE BEAST VS THE BEAST?

It’s true, true believers, the Walt Disney Company now owns Marvel Entertainment.  I wasn’t sure how to react at first- mostly, it was just outrage, with some shock and even embarassment mixed in.  But after an afternoon spent screaming from my window, throwing my comics into the street in disgust, then going back out and picking them all up because jesus christ what the hell was I thinking, I’m approaching this now with a clearer mind.  This isn’t a bad thing.  In fact, one might say it’s the opposite of a bad thing- this is a very good thing. 

A big concern people seem to have is that their favorite characters are going to be neutered: Wolverine will stop killing people, Punisher will stop killing people, and Aunt May won’t die, instead, a giant supernatural being will wish her pain away and readers won’t have to deal with the loss of- oh wait.

That’s simply not going to be the case.  First, Marvel has proven in recent years, both in comics and in movies, that when they are allowed complete creative control over their properties and characters, they deliver kick-ass entertainment that pleases both the fans AND the suits that put up the money to make it all happen.  Why in the world would Disney want to change any of that?  Second, Disney has flat out denied that they have any intention of screwing with continuity (if it ain’t broke…).  Finally, Disney is at the top of the ladder for so many other properties- Pirates of the Caribbean, Heroes, Miramax, ESPN.  And I haven’t seen Mickey showing up on Sportscenter, or Goofy trying to kill Bill.  Look at Warner Brothers and DC- I didn’t see too much of Bugs or Daffy in Dark Knight.

Disney realizes when someone’s got a good thing going.  They just want to get behind it.  And then get all the money.

And this is huge, awesome news for Marvel!  Ever wondered what an Avengers movie would look like?  Guess what- that will definitely happen now.  How about, oh, a Moon Knight movie?  Luke Cage on the silver screen?  Doctor Strange?  Marvel is going to have tons of money to make awesome movies about so many more characters than the top ten or so.  And oh man, do they have a lot of characters. 

A lot of people are still going to be complaining about this, though, but that’s just the nature of fanboys.  We’ll see who’s first in line for the 2015 release of Great Lakes Avengers.